One time while i was still in school…*yep..am out of that stressful system thank God.*…i was in class and i got a message from my long time friend…he had got into an accident a while earlier tho..so he was like body pains and shit…but no fatal injuries sha..minor bruises..anyways sha..he said he was at home..*his room in school* and he suddenly couldn’t move …body felt like a log of wood has being dropped on him and he needed to make calls and he couldn’t get up..the massager needed to come for him..and i couldn’t come out cos i was supposed to have test that immediate few minutes…so he just asked for credit so he could call’im..i was like ok…i took permission that i needed to go to the ladies
* dude we don’t gat no ladies in school..infact we don’t gat no decent toilet safe for the bushes and one horrible smelling you-could-drop-dead-just-by-entering-the-toilet-ps area toilet…yep went there once cos i was deadly pressed and i vowed never to venture on that journey ever again. It could scar anyone for life*…….sha i went out and got the card oh…good and caring friend that i was…and sent it oh to my friend..sick that he was…got back to my class..after like 5minutes…this was the reply i got…
Friend;…”Awww thanks dear…preciate it.#FYI..April fool#..
Me;…”WTF”…dude ama kill you i swear if you see me hide. Thunder fire you..OMG!!*crying*
Friend;..”Lols…hehe.
Me;..”If you de die no call me oh..” Choi i don form april first mugu..izzoria..ama have ur hide mr…ama get mine!! Believe
Friend;…”Hugz#
Me;…”Straight face”…
Oh yeah!! That got me..and then my friends got to know bout it..and laughed the hell outta me….lolz..and some actually used it one friends too..one of my besties in particular sent out alot of text like that…like am sick..am stranded, school thingie…water broke, tooth ache..nose and breast lifting, additional butt buying…low waist..lmao…*ya know what i mean*….dude she made more than 10k that day and had like 6k worth of chips in her fone by the end of that day….* i cried*…
Well..these days am super cautious..
Anyhow…Happy New Month My Luvlies!!
How did ya’all spend the Easter?…*hope not as boring as mine sha?…was home all through..ok went to church and had an awesome time in His presence..and went back to super boredom*..*sniff sniff*..
Mehn…we are just too religious and yet not actually religious people oh…smh!
Days like christmas, Good fridays and Easters..Lent period and all related days and holidays..we get extremely religious…
“Praise God!!..Holy week..I Love the Lord!..!! Jesus died for us..repent!! He is rising *dude na yeast Jesus be??…Go to the tomb..he is not there….*yeah we know that…if we give you tipex..i.e TP would you know the road..??..why urging us to go?smh…”Happy birthday jesus..”…i am God’s son/daughter i do His will”… And a whole lots of other religious proclamations…now don’t get me wrong oh…acknowledging the father…in His awesomeness..that’s beautiful…but my problem is…WHY..*emphasis*…do we have to wait for such times only before we see the writeups and post and pix and dps of Jesus pasted on fcb,twitter,instagram, bbm pms,…etc..we get sOo religious then…and just when the day is coming to an end and the festive period is dwindling down….just before the crow of midnight….things begin to change…dps with sexiness is back…secular music is on the replay…”Motivation…” Sex on the dance floor”… etc…pms and fcb stats like..”Omo..its play house something…”…”She’s getting it hot like fire tonight”…”Chika…do you know tania is such a bitch..she looked at that man i have been eyeing for ever”…and chika replies…”Oh no she didn’t”..bitch!!”….”TGIF….clubing weekend yay!!!….*rolls eyes*…it goes on…and just a few seconds ago…they were forming saint andrew and andrea…and every sunday….they drag their drunk behinds and party strunged out self and go to church and it goes on..”Peace unto! God bless! God loves you…service was awesome! I Love the Lord”….that’s just wrong.
Sha…God came for the sinners…#no judging#…we just have to mean things more sha..not just on special holz and festive periods.
You know God is one jealous God…he don’t want ya to be cold and lukewarm at thesame time..you are either one or the other…else he would sprew you out #warning#…speaking off jealousy…
I was with my sisters yesterday…they came around for the easter you know..and we all got talking catching up and shit…and she was talking bout a dude who was soo jealous and possessive over his woman..and if any dude as much as look at her, he gets a run down..you don’t touch her, don’t look @ her..don’t even smile…no dude gets VIP treatment..brothers get the 5 seconds hug…strangers don’t get close and personal with the bosom area..who you be…lolz…and he walks into her room and sees a picture of Jesus on the wall he goes berseck…
….”WTF?…who is that?..what’s he doing on your wall?..* he screams*…”Get him down!! Do i have to walk on water to get a lil some some and good loving in this house…TAKE HIM DOWN!!!….You my woman…I don’t share!! *am like nigguh puleeezz….juz a pic menhn…*crazy**lol
I don’t wanna be having a crazy ass dude like that…ah lil space would be nice..thank you very much!!
Buh chill oh…there was this rumour bout kim kan da yash…er..erm sorry..kim kadashan was saying she hated Nigeria and couldn’t wait to leave and her bro says our ladies look like apes and she agrees…..*holdup#….
First of all…*seals lips..swallows and then unseals lips*…i must have said a thousand and one yabs bout her..*assumming it was true*…how dare her…the nerve of her… We don’t blame her na…shei if Banky ..had used his benjamins for more profitable thing instead of bringing her here…and she didn’t do nothing oh..just came out smiled and waved * assuming* feeling like queen of england…we won’t have been degraded so….*fuming*… We don’t look like apes…infact we are black and beautiful..and we are naturally endowed…the african woman body is to die for…we don’t do lots of surgery to get that look or vampire blood make overs…yep we saw the video ..for regenerative young cells…we naturale..yep!! We awesome like that..plus we don’t have to get diggy-with-all the stars to be famous…plus your reality show is boring…plus…Kanye west really?….well..hope you keep this one…not up and leave’im like you did your Bball hubby…yeah!! HOw’s the divorce going??? …*uninterested face*..
Yes i must have said that and a thousand more horrible things…#listening to chris brown’s…”Don’t judge me”.#….what?? *innocent face#..*am only human…*…i thought she said it…twas very mean …but we heard again that..she didn’t so it was an imposter….*you get luck*…Sorry Kim …#stil not your fan..no personal feelings*..i just don’t see how i can waste my precious time watching other people live their lives ..parties,clubbing, sex and breakup..#steroetyped and most definitely unreal…you have a camera up in your face for shits sake…how can you act normal and tell me those reality shows are real-ish and shit!!#…#TeamDon’tLikeREalityShows#..ya don’t fool me…”Ice loves coco”..”Married to the jonas..really??…shit!!!
If it aint movies…#hey movies are different…dude stop talking..they are!!*straight face*..i aint interested.
Oh…did you know kim is now acting movies??..lolz…everyone wants to sing..then everyone wants to act…mehn they all just greedy fellas…jack of all trades…master of…
But seriously tho..Tonto decay..sorry tonto…she’s feeling fly now tho..music vids everywhere….sha we can yab and clean our ears after listening to the song in agonizing pain…but she would be counting her benjamins at the end of the day…lolz so its high time we all got creative too….hehe….
We give’em the fame without’em lifting a finger…silly lil thingies!!
….s..Easter still in the air…don’t forget to love God more than in your updates and shit!! Workers..ya all bera be getting back on the road..work starts tomorrow..kids..back to school too..iron your uniforms…as for me..well…that’s still sitting on a long thing…two months to go…and i would be serving my country….
Wait oh…heard that Fed govt has approved monthly salaries for graduates…*rubs hands together*..hope its true oh else someone would get seriously hurt*…
.s.s…Happy new month luvlies!! Happy to miss you!!*winks
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